The more time
I spend
In this world,
The less I want
To bring children
Into it.
Amritorupa Kanjilal also writes at Rivers I Have Known: Books, Reviews, and More. Please visit her there!
The Broken Shovel
4 years ago
Monday, April 13, 2009
A Very Recent Thought
The more time
I spend
In this world,
The less I want
To bring children
Into it.
Amritorupa Kanjilal also writes at Rivers I Have Known: Books, Reviews, and More. Please visit her there!
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74 paper boats came floating back to me:
nice thought..not wanting children to suffer in this cruel world!
but you must understand that everyone both good people and bad ones were once children, so its how they are brought up that determines what they do and how they feel abt this world.
we shd teach children to be true to themselves and work for a better world order.
"Neverland" ? eeh! what do you think about that plan?
amal- its much easier to just use contraceptives, no?
ST, neverland sounds good, especially since Captain Hook has now infiltrated into our world :)
"End of existance" is that the next poem you're working on ??
***based on your answer to Amal Bose
ST- unfortunately, this wont spell the end of existence. no one else seems to be as practical as me.
Amal said "we shd teach children to be true to themselves and work for a better world order." and u replied with ur usual humour "amal- its much easier to just use contraceptives, no?" SO I conclude THAT u are saying it is easier to use contraceptives than teaching children! LOL!
But coming back to the post.. I agree I keep seeing the world full of suffering.....why bring them here at all? !! Yes once they come do teach them.. I like to say [much bfr i read this here] The parents are committing the GREATEST SIN.. they are bringing children to this world to suffer.
[Hey all loving people.. I know u will now talk abt God.. and ho we are meant to live and love. i know all that.. and i too have done it.. this is just a private thot of mine seeing LGL say what I said long ago.]
@ Little Girl
"unfortunately, this wont spell the end of existence"
well actually can u tell me how our race is gonna sustain by using contraceptives..
I seriously wish my parents had thought of that!
Amal- sometimes contraceptives malfunction :)
(don't pay any attention to me. i'm just in a wicked mood today)
Kriti- Yesss! Yessssssss! found someone else who is wishing today that she was never born !
A bitter-sweet thought.We love children and yet are afraid whether they will be able to cope up...
liked it :)rextioni
come on the world is not that bad.. at least I think like that.. I get frustrated at number of times but then when I come back to senses, I thank almighty that I am alive.. :))
Oh I don't wish I to have never been born... but its like I want to give a retest for life.
Now that I know these things:
God is watching us all,a nd he loves you - Its a lie
Everything happens for good - Its a lie
If you love someone, they'll love you back - its a lie
You just have to study til calss 12 and then its all fun - its a lie
You just have to study in college then its all fun - Its a lie
You have to work hard only on weekdays, weekends are fun - Well its somewhat true, but mostly a lie
And i can go on forever...
So now that I know these little illusions... I want to re-live the past years my way.
hi meera...thanks for dropping by after such a long time :)
ST- i'm glad i'm alive too, the alternative being what it is, but i really think life is a bit over-hyped.
Till recently, I never wanted to have kids of my own.
But now I want a daughter, who I can pamper like no princess has been pampered before. Don't ask me where THAT came from.
Aniket, quoting Dylan, all the truth in the world adds up to one big lie :)
i'm happy to see life has screwed your illusions as it has screwed mine.
i dont wish i were never born. i just don't think the experience is really worth being forced on other individuals who have no say init.
Aniket, i can tell you where THAT came from- its called getting old and foggy :)
if u pamper your daughter like a princess, she is going to grow into a monster, you know.
i had daughter dreams too. but as i said, the more time i spend here,....
Well for that there is,
Aniket Thakkar's Golden rule no. 11.... "Always,... ALWAYS have an exit strategy."
- The first rule of being a revoutionary is to get away with it.
Akdam Sorry madam..plz rag korben na..Amritorupa(hope it's right!)..your thought is nice and interesting..really this world is not at all for welcoming children..so it is our duty that we should create abetter world..a little better than the world we live in..what u feel?
Did you just call my daughter a monster?? How dare you!!!
Pampering doesn't mean she'll not learn the values of life I'll teach her. I know enough pampered people who are very nice humble human beings.
Am very mad at you...
@ Little girl
ha ha..
ya they certainly do...
Ur blog...is breathtaking.
And if u really are a collector of wierdoes...ur going to want me! lol.
I agreee. Children...should not have to go thru this...all this...
then again.
: Its the children, who can change the world...for the better.
Ur post inspired me to reply :) do visit my blog...and im totally going to follow urs.
BTw, No offense, but ive imitated ur syle of writing...imitation=flattery u get it :)
Okay, LGL, I am the one with the mother in law visiting and YOU are the one wishing not to inflict this life on anyone else?? It's all in the persepctive, my dear. :)
TRUE.Do read the first two post of my blog (I mean the oldest one's)2007 and then I got one a special one for "Indian Idol"
i feel the happiness.....
the joy ....
after the tears are gone...
is what life is all about ...
its beautiful!!!
we are here to bring more joy!!!!-to the deprived :-)
Hey L'tl Girl, I am late:(
It's a deep thought & not so uncommon. I think there'll be none in this world who would not have thought that atleast once in their life-time.
I think this could very well be taken as a topic for debate...hmmm...now where do I begin??
Partially it is true, when you consider the sufferings go on around you...But who is actually responsible for such happenings? They are the also the people around you!
So how can you reform them?
The possible answer is it's easier to reform children rather than reform the elders(whose beliefs would have taken deep roots). It is the responsibility of every parent(atleast one of the parent) to be with the child until the child turns 5.It's called the developmental stage or the absorbing stage. Teach your child qualities that you wish to see around you. Teach him/her the imporatance of living a fuller & fruitful life by connecting to the family, friends & nature. Teach the child the importance of honesty, integrity, self-less & unconditional love, tolerance & self-esteem.
Tolerance,and not love is the panecia for peace. You can tolerate someone you dislike,you cannot love him/her.
Patience is as essential as tolerance but that should never be mistaken for cowardice.
One of my Profs, Mr. Vijay Nair, used to say..
"Never get into a fight, but if you do...make the other person realize that it was a big mistake!"
I really believe that positive people attract the positive(going against the theory..)Else how can you explain so many wonderful bloggers coming together & exchanging such beautiful views:)
I think people should learn something from bloggers..coz they are always getting into constructive, rather than destructive critisicm. I think the world will be a better place with us bloggers alone, what say:)
But seriously guys, today's children ARE tomorrow's citizens so:
You sow an action you reap a habit. You sow a habit,you reap a character.You sow a character,you reap a destiny.(says some old quote)
One more thing,
If you have a choice of taking two paths, always take the more daring of the two(Remember R.Frost). It can often result in extraordinary results.
So be happy & make others happy:)
Anyways I like Aniket's Princess daughter(manasaputri).
Since I have a daughter & I have gone thru such contemplations...I was able to give you an insight(of what happens within me...!) A bit more experienced you see:)
Deepa manasputri??
Where did that come from?
I was planning to name her Trinity/Tashayar/Betty/Shirin or something on those lines.
PS: Liked what Mr. Nair said. :-)
I think u r forgetting the pandora's box....hope is still alive .... and as long as hope is alive, this world will exist and so would life...
In BTW, I too believe parenting is the greatest and most difficult job on this earth....but we should take up responsibilty rather than shruggling off and taking refuge in escapism....keep walking!!!
And Little girl Lost.... I could have enjoyed the Bush post coz I am a bong too...anyways...:)
Why?
There is SO much beauty in the world and so so much to explore, conversations to be had, hugs to be given and received, laughter to be heard...I can go on and on....
The little one should come, whenever you think it is the right time.
Aniket, by manasaputri I just meant mind-born. In Indian myth there are mind-born gods & godesses(donno they fall under the distinction of God). Eg: Brahma is said to've created mind-born sons & daughter.
So the daughter you referred is in your mind,right? Mind-born daughter...:)
Aniket- i'm sure she'll grow up to be a VERY nice monster, like princess fiona :)
(no, no, don't hit me, please)
And you can call her betty/veronica/hermione/fiona/ whatever you like, you anglisized dhakkan. manasputri means a daughter of your imagination.
deepa, next time you throw sanskrit at aniket, be sure to translate. :)
Coffee,
Woohooo!! that was a real shot in the arm!
i loved your blog tto, girl! and i loved how you used my style... your line is even better. people please check out her post :)
Jennifer, maybe i'll write this next: The more i live, the more convinced i am that parents-in-law should stay at home and NOT visit.
i wrote something for you that i think you'll like. i'll put it up on thursday:)
ST- Will do, buddy.
Karmanna, what a lovely thought! cheers to that:)
ssquo and anurak- i have a feeling i'm going to revert to that line of thinking very soon.
Anurak- SO good to meet another bong...
Deepa, i was actually waiting for your take on this because i know you are a mom :) i loved how you refused to skim the surface and went into the depth of the question. you are right,just deciding not to have kids is like taking a short cut... the easier way out.
i loved Mr. Nair's thought too.
and as i said, if you're going to fling sanskrit at our aniket, you'll need to suppliment it with a translation.:)
only one thing wht i believe...
Every individual has its own destiny.. n fate...
yes there r some odr factors...whcih makes soceity horrible...but why we only see the negative part...in this world u find evry kind of people....
so instead of negative people we shld better concentrate on Positive one...
not to forget nobody is bad by birth, its the circumstances which makes person like ths..even parents too, they wud nvr like to see thier child as brat....
i must really aprreciate ur thot...
P.S: it only my thot...every individual has different views...
:)
Pallav
the more time YOU spent in this world, children would love to share the space! think about it girl. the world is good enuf, just feel the smile. be happy cos every frown is destined to be killed by a smile, some day.
Since she will make a new post only on thursday.. I came to read this again..
Now on a different note.. Yes I still feel the same.. when I watch how children grow up struggling with studies- big bags on their backs, exams and finally into a harsh world of career and rat races.. and building up their own families and the cycle continues... I feel that the cruelest thing a parent does is when they bring forth children in this world.
But still it is also true this IS WHAT IT IS!
CREATION cannot be stiffled.. Life has to go on in cycles till Some Super Power or Nature as the case maybe decides that everything should STOP..
Or else just go on creating life... and enjoy the small happinesses aroun you..yeah.. even a small comment can give you happiness.. as I can see Little Gal gets from so many comments she receives here... and I get in return making her happy this way...
If Little Girl was NOT born then would I have had this chance to be HAPPY by making her happy?
So KEEP PRODUCING CHILDREN and GIRLS more!! Of course I had TO add this last PUNCH LINE!!!!
I always wonder about that. But I always come to the conclusion that life as we know it is full of ups and downs anyway, and we can't protect children from that any more than we can protect them from the cruel world. It's what makes us human- that learning process.
If my folks had decided that they didn't want to bring me into the world because of how awful it was, I would never be here. And now that I am, I would never trade this experiencefor anything. So in the end, however bad it gets, however scary, I want to bring in another being into it, to experience life and all its scariness and cruelty, but also all its beauty and wonder.
Seventeen words were enough to create a long debate, huh!!
I agree with you, the world is turning uninhabitable with every passing day but I love life...
bal,dunia ta motei eto kharap noy.
There are times when I hate the world I live in. The people who seems to be trying to suck out the life outta everything.
And then there are times when I wish I could live forever among such beautiful friends and family and the beauty of every new morning.
You can't possibly be sure when you say I am not strong enough to bring a child into this world. Because when you are protecting her from all this madness you are also depriving her of so much happiness and of course your love.
I know I am rambling. :) Forgive me.
duniya motei kharap noy... duniya ta sole orthohin!! and meaninglessness can be good sometimes... jodi meaninglessness r bhoytake soriye rakha jay... its good to come to this earth... but its painful to grow up ! and see the meaning of the words changing with time... and ultimately loosing all the meanings ...
still we've got no other options... as choices were not offered to us.. the worst thing is that when someone grows up and discover he can't complain to any one at all for anything... that he is responsible for every action he takes... this big big big empty space is hard to swallow !!!
how true, how true...
but we gotta keep the hopes alive, dear.. :)
children have allll the answers...
ok people. now that i think every body has commented, i think i should let you in on a secret...
i just wrote this line to get everybody's goat... :D
imagine just 17 words stirring up a debate like this.
and now that i've sufficiently annoyed/depressed/agitated you, please cheer up. the next post will be limericks!!
& shravan wins it :) he dint comment. instincts instincts :)
shubho noboborsho to you as well, guess what? this noboborsho and vishu are the same. both stands for the new year right? nabobarsho for bengali new year and vishu for malayali new year:)
Deepa,
I guess I concentrated a bit too much on Greek mythology and neglected Indian a bit. :-)
Yes, a figment of imagination she is (for now :-) )
And LGL,
Fiona did cross my mind... but I HATE Veronica... I love Betty Cooper. Annabeth/Elanora/Elise/Esmeralda are good names too. :-)
Yes
you need less TIME to bring children into the world?
i am devicing a strategy to make the pregnancy time period to shrink from 9 months to 2 months...
thanks for visiting my page
god bless
www.chronicwriter.com
Hey me thinks kids are necessary for little devils like me to make me realize I need to clean up my act and be a perfect mom...trust me my son made me a better person..
So guess its gonna be an individual choice after all like to get married, live in or stay alone forever...duhh all the options sucks!! Nice blog and I will be a frequent peeper here for sure coz I see you have that ability to stir up debates with just a few lines...omg and I try to write paras after paras and no one responds!!!
ha ha ok...I'll remember tht L'tl girl.And aniket now you've got bac to the roots:)
But seriously, L'Girl after giving vent to my flooding thoughts...I sound like a preacher! [Moreover consider the time...it was 12:15am!!(I donno why it's showing 12:15PM!!)]
Done gal...followed u, added u on my reader and saved u in my list...I leave no stones unturned to make sure my daily dose of entertainment is on my laptop step!! Sheesh I sound so desperate no? that's coz I have enough time to kill...thanks for dropping by..
some very serious thought there! but you know what...The bad things in life are worth dealing with for those very few good things..but I completely agree with you!
I'm finally finally finally here.
You have certainly gotten my curiosity up about your history LGL, with these poems, your avatar name, and your very interesting spirit. I hope to come to India sometime and have a good lengthy time to sit and have tea with you and listen to your life story.
Not bringing children into this world sounds, in your case, to be a choice of compassion. And there are so many children already here who need a loving home, for them there is no choice, they are already here. God bless them. It is not an easy world, but there is SO MUCH BEAUTY, even through the darkness...
This is a very serious thought AMRITORUPA...
we bloggers cn understand the depth of it but others wont LGL..:P thats easy...
Though it would seem pretty illogical, but, what would the concerned children have to say about it(given that they have a choice to make)?
No one said that life is peace and happiness all the way...in fact it is pretty hard to appreciate anything when the opposite doesn't exist.
Who knows? Even if paradise did exist, we might have found a way to bring in some trouble just to make things less monotonous.
Remember those "All happy families..." opening lines from Anna Karenina?
PS: Following you...
I deleted those two posts.So you cud not view them..have uploaded them again.do take a look
comments are so scattered... and they are so distinctly spread over a huge domain.. sometiems lost somewhere at the end of the earth... I'm lost... and can't gather any more word.. to express anything!!! m in a super... ultra... hyper confused state of mind...!!!
Hi, thanks for dropping by! This thought of yours, so true. Being a mom of three, I wouldn't wish that now but having them has tripled my worries. Although my worries do not compensate for the joy of having them in my life. :D You have a very thoughtful blog. Will be visiting again for sure..
;) sometimes it helps.. join the red chaddi campaign
what a painfully wonderful thought! seriously.... sad, but so true...
A thought that haunts me all the time. I'm glad someone else has these thoughts too.
funny...the more time i spend with children...the less i'm worried about the world...
very thoughtful... yet i believe we have powers to make the world beautiful for our kids.. else it all makes no sense :)
Oh you sneaky girl you! Playing with our emotions this way!
How true!
This cruel little world!
But I am still going to take up that challenge! You read my latest acrostic right :) That's what its all about!
Hey Girl,
Just came across ur blog. phew a hell lot of paper boats floating back to u huh. well this is just another one. Was just thinking that u wished u were not born I wonder what would the orphans feel..
Anyway happy blogging!
Lovely thought!
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